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Having on numerous ocassions experienced the heavenly blessing of an all-in freeroll as well as the hellish damnation of drawing dead on the turn, noted gambling authority and obsessive poker player Dick Bill has spent years drawing a stark line between poker and life that most people agree looks a whole lot more like a circle. Drawing his exclusive religious ideology from a game of chance has resulted in a collection of what some might consider odd beliefs, prayers, rituals, devotions, artifacts and commandments. Below are some facts outlining Dick’s statistically grounded and vastly underated religious convictions:
- Christianity’s long-winded, Latin-translated rulebook has been replaced by a 52-page bible that is easily memorized and even allows its pages to appear in any order.
- Although Dick wholly refuses the ingestion of Holy Water, he tirelessly consumes large quantities of a self-blessed, hops-based drink known primarily as “betting fluid.”
- Out of respect to other religions, Dick politely accompanies each of his raises with the one-line prayer, “Raise the Lord!”
- Tithing is only expected from other players.
- Pocket aces is a direct sign of God’s divine blessing – 86 percent of the time, at least.
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Eye on Dick
The Recoil Handbook
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